I get a lot of messages from guys asking how to convince their lady to try this out…that and a lot of dick pics…sooo many dick pics, guys!
So I’m not a fan of talking someone into doing something they’re not interested in. A lot of you have shy/religious/vanilla wives and don’t know how to bring it up so that she’ll give it a try or even just entertain the idea as fantasy. I’m going to offer you some back up here…but you might have to take a different approach to ‘convince’ her to actually do this. You know best what she’ll respond to and for me it was about what we, as a couple would get from this, it wasn’t (just) about the sex.
So if you approach this as something you two are doing as a couple then I can tell you what we’ve gained from our experiences so far and maybe in some small way it’ll help: First and foremost you’re going to love your husband more than ever before…not possible? Yeah I thought so too but I was wrong (and that’s never happened before, I swear). If you’re doing things right there’s been tons of communication between you both before, during and after…talking about fantasies, boundaries, expectations, etc. is the first thing they’ll bring you closer. Then comes the realization that the person who you married loves and trusts you so much that they’re able to encourage you to fulfill this fantasy. Every so often (ok,ok…all the time) I realize how much my husband must love me in order to trust and share me. It’s a powerful mix of emotions and I suggest you enjoy every second of it. So far sharing me has only increased the love and intimacy we already have. Being with someone else is fun but coming home to someone who knows just what buttons to push is priceless. I know that the new relationship energy and hot sex are a big draw in this lifestyle but take it from me it’s not reserved for ‘new people’ only, you’ll feel the same way about your husband….I guarantee it!
To quote the infamous Kanye West (and/or Daft Punk)…We’re harder, better, faster, stronger… than we were before we started. This can make an awesome relationship even better. We’ve spent the last few months talking about our sex life, our marriage, our wants, our kinks, our frustrations, our expectations, etc. Sharing this kink will blow open the lines of communication, we’ve had a blast talking about these new ideas, people & experiences. Reading posts on here and elsewhere has spurred a lot of conversations between us that we may have never explored otherwise. We approach this as a couple, we’re a united front and we look at it like something we’re adding to our sex life so we should both enjoy it and get something from it.
I’ve met people that I never would have crossed paths with in my daily life. We have been very fortunate to meet and chat with so many interesting guys from all over the world. I love getting your messages and hearing about your interests, your kinks, your relationships, etc. It’s been fun meeting up with a new guy and getting a little peek into their lives, I like that this type of relationship allows people to open up a lot more…it’s all the fun of dating without the bullshit. You can make friends along the way, as we have, and then it makes it even more fun. So far we’ve been in touch (in one way or another) with Doctors, Businessmen, Students, Professors, Wealthy mysterious Dom’s, blue collar guys, accountants, artists, musicians and on and on…it’s been interesting to get to know new people as a couple and individually. If you want more experience, more variety, to add ‘spice’ to your life then get in on this because you’ll be exposed to a lot of new people and personalities.
I was never big on fantasies and I never really had a ‘sex bucket list’, I’m more of a in the moment, want the real deal kind of girl…why think about it when I can have the real thing…right? Well that’s changed and now I do and it’s pretty awesome…I’m sure my husband would agree as he gets to hear all the kinky things I want to try and do and the things I’d never do but are just fun to think about. I was far from being a close minded, inexperienced person before we started but I’ve found I’m even more open to new things now, could be the result of talking about sex 24/7…maybe. We like to chat with people before meeting and get to know them a bit and inevitably I get asked what are your fantasies, what you are into, what do you like in bed, favorite positions, all that good stuff. I had to really think about it because it’s been awhile since I thought about it. After being married for a while you just know what works so it’s easy to forget to branch out and try new things and this opened up an opportunity for us to re-evaluate what we like and what else we might want to experience or explore. It helps that we’ve received a lot of very detailed messages of what guys want to do if we were to meet and we’ve been asked/invited/offered some wild propositions…they’ve been added to the bucket list. Reddit Specific: Y’all are some cool ass people! I thoroughly enjoy the messages that have come our way and we have been lucky enough to get to know a few of you a little more personally. We started here asking questions of you and it was a huge help to us and continues to be. I love that we have people to reach out to when we want to hear some first-hand experience. We also have found that sharing our adventures, pics, audio with the select few of you has been fun for us. We’ve definitely gained an Encyclopedia of sexual ideas from you guys…so thanks for that, by the way.
I had some ideas of what this kink was before we started and a lot of it didn’t appeal to me, it sounds more like a sub-wife thing and that’s definitely not my style. I wanted to know from someone who’s been there and done that how this would affect my marriage. It was also a lot to wrap my head around and I wanted only positive things to come from this. So far we’ve been lucky and have created a way for us to fulfill this kink in an exciting way that makes our marriage that much better and leaves everyone happy.