Want to know what not to do? Good! Here’s my list of the 12 easiest ways to piss off, scare off and plain old turn off a hotwife, well at least this hotwife right here. I know that’s very broad and I know that I’m being very snarky in this list but I can also say that I speak from experience, which is unfortunate in this case. It may be personal to me and other couples who have their own way of doing things but this list includes the things that I sure as hell could live without. 

For all that is holy please DO NOT:

Call me by ‘pet names’. I’m not your babe, baby, sweetheart, etc…I’ve done polls and literally not a single hotwife said she liked being called pet names. It’s especially strange coming from a complete stranger. Even if you’re ‘just being friendly’ it’s bad manners to start a conversation by calling someone sweetheart, baby, honey, etc.

Ask me to refer you to other wives (especially before we’ve even met up). I get it, you like hotwives but why would I recommend you to someone if I haven’t fucked you? If I have fucked you it’s rude to ask to fuck my friends, unless I mention it.

Send me unsolicited dick pics. If I wanted to see your cock, I’d ask. Personally I’m only interested in seeing a dick that I have a chance of playing with…like from those I’m meeting up with. A message that literally is only a dick pic is so bad it’s borderline comical.

Ask me to teach you anything. I’m a normal human woman…not a sex god, a cougar, a teacher, or a mentor. I’ve had guys who are like a year or two younger than I am act like I must have some amazing secret sex skills or some secret old people knowledge to pass down before I hit the grave. It’s quite annoying and a turn off because I’m looking for an equal give and take and a fwb…not to teach you how to fuck women.

Degrade or talk shit about my spouse. My husband is not a cuckold and I have no idea why anyone would try to start or steer a conversation that way. I’m pretty sure that if people are into the cuckold thing they’ll let you know. If they don’t let you know then never assume. I instantly loathe the people who mention that they need to outdo my husband, be better in bed than him or generally speak ill of my marriage or man.

Try or start sexting me at completely inappropriate times. I”ve had far too many conversations where I’ll kindly and clearly mention that I’m busy with my kids or doing something family related and suddenly it’s like ‘hey look at my cock and describe what you’ll do to it’. Ummm, no thank you. If I want to sext or chat about sex, hotwifing, hooking up, past adventures, etc I’ll probably mention it or be receptive to it. If I shut it down just stop, don’t keep pushing for sexy chat or live sexy pics if you know I’m otherwise engaged in something not at all sexy.

Don’t undervalue a hotwife. Some folks are eager to offer money in exchange for pics, videos, etc. (Not sex, never exchange sex & money). I’m talking about the gentlemen who enjoy the added taboo or just want to have private pics/custom videos here by the way. To some degree it’s flattering and I’m personally not against it (many women will be deeply offended though). I think the problem arises when they want to haggle and/or negotiate. If you want to make an offer, make it a generous one. If you can’t afford to then don’t. Nobody wants to be nickel and dimed and hotwives are no exception. Also does nobody realize that for the most part we’re women who are grown so we have $, spouses, jobs, lives, etc….throwing a $20 at me and asking for very private things just ain’t gonna work.

Be a pic collector. I loathe this more than anything. Play along like we’re gonna meet up and get tons of pics and videos and chat for days on end….only to disappear.  If you try to manipulate or guilt someone into sharing pics that’s also a bit deplorable in general so don’t do it. We all hate pic/video collectors, it’s just a fact. Don’t be that guy.

Use old photos and/or blurry photos. Why!?! With 3 kids, a marriage, a home and a life to attend to I’m able to take a few up to date pics to share if need be. Why can’t men do the same. I assume it’s because you’re fatter, uglier, balder or all of the above. In any case it’s an immediate red flag and I’ll be too turned off to meet you. It also shows that you’re lacking intelligence if you think that anyone would meet up with a man alone after having only seen one blurry zoomed out pic from 1994. No bueno.

Send me a photo (usually unsolicited dick pics) and then demand one in return. I didn’t ask for your pics and I’m under no obligation to ‘return the favor’. Just stop doing that. This isn’t the schoolyard so even if you show me yours I won’t show you mine.

Bonus Tip: Please don’t sugar coat what you want. I feel like this is straight up manipulation and I have no tolerance for it. If you’re wanting to chat, say so. If you’re interested in meeting up, say so. If you only want to swap pics or stories, say so. Being unclear and secretive about your intentions is weird and unnecessary.